Book Review: I’m Absolutely Fine! : A Manual For Imperfect Women by Annabel Rivkin and Emilie McMeekan of The Midult

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‘I have been waiting for this book my entire life. It’s brilliant.’ – Claudia Winkleman

‘A genius book. So funny, so wise, so cool and above all so USEFUL. I couldn’t love it more. I am buying it for every one of my friends.’ – India Knight

‘I’m absolutely fine but I slightly need to pee, I followed the road less travelled and now I don’t know where the hell I am, I may bleed to death shaving my legs, my soul aches, another week has ended without me becoming accidentally rich, I just put my keys in the fridge, unexpected object in the bagging area, I’ll have a café mocha vodka Valium latte to go please, where’s my phone? My anxieties have anxieties, no… not like that – here, I’ll do it, do I have to do everything? WTF?’

Is it just me? We gnaw on that, don’t we? Is it just me? Well, look around. Look at the rage, the resolution, the ‘hear me roar’, the panic, the power, the chin hairs, the shame, the empathy, the conversation, the sheer potential.

Welcome to Midulthood. A place where we recognise that we are all more alike than we are unalike. Of course it’s not just you. If we’re not in it together, we’re not in it at all…

From sex (What Could Possibly Go Wrong) to self-image (Does This Straightjacket Make Me Look Fat?), I’m Absolutely Fine is a wry look at real life, real wisdom and real information framed in fun.”

 

 

A few weeks ago I was in hospital having (yet another) surgery on my piles – and whilst scrolling through Instagram spotted a competition to win a copy of this book on the lovely doesmybumlook40’s page:

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So, obviously I had to reply:

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A few days later I got a message saying I’d won copies for me and my friend and asking for our addresses – how exciting!

When it arrived (signed, get me!) I started reading straight away. In fact, I left it by the toilet as it was perfect to dip in and out of with my numerous post surgery toilet trips. (Although I DEFINITELY don’t think it was written as a toilet book, in fact who would have books in the toilet nowadays *whistles nonchalantly*)

On a geeky book loving note – it is a beautiful weight, and has a ribbon bookmark inside – retro and gorgeous!

Now I expected to LOVE this – the recommendations by Claudia Winkelman and India Knight added to my expectations (I secretly want to be BFFs with them both) and I really did enjoy lots of it.  Some of the lists had me crying laughing – just soooooo accurate.

This one in particular has been in the press loads, so I don’t feel guilty sharing it:

“20 THINGS YOU KNOW IF YOU’RE A MIDULT

1. Nothing good happens at three in the morning.

2. You should never buy the smallest size you can get into.

3. Everyone needs therapy.

4. Grey hair is beautiful, grey roots make you look deranged.

5. Time flies.

6. You are probably a little bit of an alcoholic. Unless you are actually an alcoholic, in which case you may have given up drinking.

7. You are always hungry.

8. If you check out of technology, you are checking out of life. Don’t do it.

9. If someone has no old friends, there is a problem.

10. Infidelity doesn’t necessarily mean it’s over. Contempt does.

11. Things get stuck in your teeth.

12. Something always hurts.

13. And then you think it’s cancer.

14. You know more and less at the same time. You think they might cancel each other out. So where does that leave us?

15. Good sleep is better than good sex.

16. Moths make you panic. Even talking about them: panic.

17. You have 25 different kinds of herbal tea. You don’t much like any of them. You’d rather have a Diet Coke. But you probably won’t.

18. Swearing f***ing helps.

19. This is the rush hour of life: we have spots, wrinkles and possibly braces.

20. If you need to cancel, you need to cancel.”

But lots of the other lists are even funnier (and ruder!) but you need to buy the book for those #nospoilershere!!

I guess the fact I overshadow ridiculously means I often know things aren’t just me (I was amazed how many friends had period issues / had had endometrial ablations and privately messaged me when I publicly discussed them) but I still enjoyed empathising no end.

Most of the book I absolutely loved – but occasional chapters I felt were a bit neurotic and self indulgent. Maybe if I was at a different stage in my life I may have empathised more – but it seemed like a totally different world that I didn’t quite get. I feel bad writing that – especially when it was a lovely free copy – but I do like to be honest.

Overall, though, I definitely enjoyed it – and will dip in and out of it again in the future – and probably quote the lists incessantly to people!

I now follow The Midult on social media – and totally concur with most of their posts – so I’m very glad to have found them.  This would make a perfect Christmas present for ‘women of a certain age’!!

Book Review: Feminists Don’t Wear Pink (and other lies) curated by Scarlett Curtis

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This book – curated by Scarlett Curtis – had been on my radar, I’d seen some tweets and it had been reviewed in Red Magazine – but I hadn’t actually ordered it.  Then, on October 4th, after Penguin had set up a a pop up stall to sell the book in the flagship Top Shop store on Oxford Street in London, they were asked to take it all down again allegedly upon the instruction of Top Shop supremo Sir Philip Green. A Topshop spokesperson said: “…. we made the decision from a production and creative standpoint to retract the Feminists Don’t Wear Pink and Other Lies pop-up from one of our stores. We are sorry – this in no way reflects our stance on feminism and we will be making a donation of £25,000 to Girl Up. We continue to fully support the sentiment of the book, Scarlett Curtis, feminism and equality.”  This was before the recent news reports about Mr Green hit the press, post House of Lords revelations, but I think the #pinknotgreen hashtag was searingly appropriate even at that point.

Anyway – in a fit of solidarity with Ms Curtis, I bought a copy!  Here’s the Amazon blurb:

We asked 52 women: what does the F word mean to you? 
The result is extraordinary.
The must-read book for 2018. Follow @feminists on Instagram for updates. 
Curated by journalist and activist Scarlett Curtis, with incredible pieces by:
Emma Watson – Zoe Sugg – Keira Knightley – Gemma Arterton – Bridget Jones (by Helen Fielding) – Saoirse Ronan – Liv Little – Dolly Alderton – Karen Gillan – Alicia Garza – Jameela Jamil – Kat Dennings – Nimco Ali – Beanie Feldstein – Olivia Perez – Amika George – Evanna Lynch – Akilah Hughes – Tanya Burr – Grace Campbell – Alison Sudol – Elyse Fox – Charlie Craggs – Rhyannon Styles – Skai Jackson – Tasha Bishop – Lolly Adefope – Bronwen Brenner – Dr Alaa Murabit – Trisha Shetty – Jordan Hewson – Amy Trigg – Em Odesser – Emi Mahmoud – Lydia Wilson – Swati Sharma
Warning: contains a lot of feminism and some explicit content!

**Published in partnership with Girl Up, the UN women’s foundation, royalties will benefit this amazing charity**   “

It is a really varied book – as you would expect from many women’s own experience of feminism.  Some of it was funny, some tragic, some historical, some forward looking, some educational – and I really enjoyed all of those different aspects.  It was perfect to read one person’s chapter at a a time (yes, it was a ‘toilet’ book for me post bowel surgery……)

Some of it has been horribly misquoted in certain elements of the press.  For example it was said Keira Knightley SLAMMED the Duchess of Cambridge, who gave birth a day after Keira herself, for posing on the hospital steps.  But it wasn’t written like that at all.  In my eyes, Ms Knightley was pitying Kate for having to be on show like that – not saying she was doing womanhood a disservice by doing it.  But hey – why let the actual context of a written piece get in the way of then newspapers stoking up a supposed catfight between celebrity women……

Some of the contributors were a lot younger than me – but I didn’t find that an issue – and I liked the different perspective.

Overall it was a good read – and I’m not sure I could have found a better book for my ‘A book about feminism’ prompt for my 2018 Reading Challenge!

In another review I read it said to give this to every teenage girl you know!  Well, I went for donating my copy to the teenage girl resident in this house.  She reckons she’s far too busy with Year 11 revision to read it – so I’ve just left it in her bedroom – and hope she’ll be inspired to read it in the future.